Ello fren dem,
One round of group games to go and only Ireland, Zambia, Costa Rica, Panama and Vietnam are confirmed to be packing their bags for home. There’s eleven more trapdoors waiting to drop open but no certainty around who will be standing on them (though there’s a few clinging on only by the most technical of fingernails – looking at you South Korea). Given the frantic nature of group stage football, let’s waste no further time and get right into it!
Group A
New Zealand 0 – 1 Philippines
I have never been so torn about a result in my life (NB: this sensation lasted 24 hours)! On the one hand: bloody hell New Zealand. You go and get the win over Norway and so only need to win here, against the weakest team in the group, and you’re through to the round of 16 for the first time in history? You’ve bottled it! On the other: oh my goodness, the Philippines! You bloody beauties! Debutants at this World Cup and already chalking up a big win! Look, however you cut it, this is the beauty of sport – it refuses to fully adhere to the narratives we try to impose on it. Sarina Bolden’s header from a free kick was backed with the power of destiny – or at least that’s what I’d be saying if I was the Kiwi keeper who let it burst through her hands. Both these teams now have a fighters chance of going through but both remain firmly underdogs.
Norway 0 – 0 Switzerland
So uh, how about those Norwegians, huh? With one game to go, Norway are in real danger of sinking without a trace. This draw means qualification is out of their hands now – they are relying on Switzerland to beat New Zealand and they need to beat the Philippines – either of those results don’t turn up, and they’re goners. If they play with twice the energy they showed here, it probably won’t be enough. Switzerland, on the other hand, have nearly locked down a very stress-free ride into the knockouts.
Group B
Canada 2 – 1 Ireland
Two fun facts. One: it is possible for a player in football to take a corner and score directly by imparting enough curl and distance on the kick – this kind of goal is called an Olympico. Two: Canada are the reigning Olympic gold medallists in women’s football. It’s pretty delicious then, that 7 minutes into this match, Irish star Katie McCabe did an Olympico on the Olympic champs. Ireland’s first ever goal in a WWC. That was, sadly for the Irish, as good as it got. Canada had been pressing but the equaliser ended up being a scrappy own goal – these seem like luck but are often a symptom of a team being absolutely under the pump. The winner was a peach – Sophie Schmidt nailed a lovely pass into Adriana Leon who had ghosted between the Irish centre-backs and finished calmly. That confirmed Ireland as the first team to be eliminated – they’ll have nothing to play for against Nigeria in the last matchday.
Australia 2 – 3 Nigeria
Australia’s injury crisis worsened ahead of this match but for 45 minutes, they dominated this game and got just reward when Emily van Egmond found space around the penalty spot to tuck one home. They couldn’t even get to half-time though before Uchenna Kanu pounced on a loose ball in the Matildas’ box to equalise. After half time, Nigeria brought on superstar Asisat Oshoala and piled on the pressure. After Australia failed to deal with a corner, Osinachi Ohale hurled herself at the bouncing ball and carried it and herself into the net for only the price of an Aussie boot to the shoulder. Two minutes later, the Super Falcons doubled their lead. A long ball forward should have been dealt with by Alanna Kennedy but with keeper Mackenzie Arnold coming for it as well, their mutual hesitation allowed Oshoala to steal in. The angle was acute but Oshoala produced a cute finish and Australia were in a hole. Kennedy made partial amends in added time, but it wasn’t enough – the Matildas must beat Canada to stay in their own World Cup. (NB: oh god why is football like this why do we do this to ourselves).
Group C
Japan 2 – 0 Costa Rica
There might be a way to win a group game more efficiently but I’ve not seen it. Hog the ball like a pair of older siblings forced to take care of their baby sister for an afternoon in the park? Check. Put the underdog team under so much pressure that it’s inevitable they fall apart like a chunk of pulled pork? Check. And when they do, score two goals in three minutes from Hikaru Naomoto and Aoba Fujino before playing the rest of the game out with no muss and/or fuss. Check. Japan had basically booked their place in the knockouts after 120 minutes of game time and, given the result that was to follow, confirmed that their match with Spain will determine who gets to top this group.
Spain 5 – 0 Zambia
I hadn’t seen a more efficient group game win before Japan 2 – 0 Costa Rica, but immediately after it, I saw Spain go one better. Why wait a whole 25 minutes to score your pair of goals when you can do it after just 10? Then rinse and repeat in the second half just to really stick the knife in. Jennifer Hermoso is one of the best players in the world and she needed no invitation to pick up a couple of goals here. Zambia have had a poor World Cup but they’ve had a huge number of hurdles to overcome just to be here so I’m not going to stick the knife in. Hopefully they’ll put in a good show against Costa Rica and then be able to be back stronger next time.
Group D
England 1 – 0 Denmark
Lau. Ren. James. Stop it. The major point of difference for an injury hit England, James was finally given a chance to strut her stuff in a starting role and boy oh boy did she strut. Only seven minutes into the match she picked the ball up in the half space on the turn, took two touches round a stranded Danish midfielder and still outside the box wrapped her foot around the ball and bent it like Beckham into the bottom corner. After that, it was comfortable for England (worrying injury to Keira Walsh aside) although their inability to kill off games they’re dominating could come back to bite.
China 1 – 0 Haiti
Oh Haiti. The injustice. China dominated the first half hour here, as expected, but on the half-hour, Zhang Rui went in for a tackle and innocently planted her entire foot, studs up, into Sherly Jeudy’s knee. The referee, who I can only presume was doing an extended blink during the incident, initially gave her a yellow; but in modern football, Big Brother is always watching and he recommends you upgrade that to the first red card of the tournament. Down to ten players, the Steel Roses had to show what they’re made of. It turns out they aren’t misnamed. Melchie Dumornay had the best chance: free on the six yard line she managed to release a snapshot goalward but Zhu Yu moved like lightning to palm strongly away. Then, disaster for Haiti. Zhang Linyan turned Ruthny Mathurin inside out and was stepped on for her troubles – Wang Shuang popped the resulting penalty away. Haiti should have had two penalties in injury time but somehow they were denied; China holding on for a victory that leaves qualification from this group open to everyone.
Group E
USA 1 – 1 Netherlands
The big one. The 2019 final redux. Run it back. Before this match, Dutch coach Andries Joncker had given this the big ones, claiming the USA were no longer preeminent in athleticism in the women’s game. His players had to back him up, and they did when Lieke Mertens went on a delightful gamble halfway up the pitch leaving US players in her wake. It came to nothing initially but broke to Jill Roord on the edge of the box who fired it through a crowd of players and home – the first time the USA had trailed in a World Cup game since the 2011 quarter-final. That’s 17 World Cup games for those keeping count at home that they’d never once been behind. Aura punctured? Maybe but they came back with a vengeance in the second half. Perhaps you can blame Daniëlle van de Donk for her deliberate and successful attempts to wind up her Lyon teammate Lindsey Horan, but honestly, we love to see a bit of trouble-making, a bit of niggle, a bit of mind games. Unfortunately for van de Donk and the Netherlands, getting into Horan’s head only made her madder – she powered past the orange defence at a corner and buried the header. But the USA couldn’t find another, denied a winner by the offside flag.
Portugal 2 – 0 Vietnam
Vietnam battled valiantly here but Portugal were just too good. They only needed seven minutes to score but they had already spurned two golden chances to take the lead. It arrived when Telma Encarnação gobbled up a delicious cross from Lúcia Alves having found a metric acre of space in the Vietnamese box. Encarnação turned provider on the 21st minute, sliding in Kika Nazareth who feinted to shoot with power but instead rolled the ball gently into the far corner. Delectable stuff that confirmed Vietnam’s exit from the tournament and sets up Portugal to take their best shot at the USA in a winner takes all final game.
Group F
France 2 – 1 Brazil
Another big one. The 2019 round of 16 rematch, two teams with delusions of grandeur and a whole lot to prove – France held to a draw by Jamaica and staring an early group exit in the face; Brazil having played France 11 times and never having won. And the first half of this match went more like the second of those trends than the first. France were all over the Seleção and opened the scoring quickly. Kadidiatou Diani was guilty of profligacy against Jamaica so understandably directed her onward header towards teammate Eugénie Le Sommer and the French talisman decided that the buck was going to stop with her, dropping her header into the far corner. Brazil clawed one back completely against the run of play, Debinha finding space in the box and placing a curved finish inside the rear post; but they were up against it. It was the set piece wot dun it in the end – Wendy Renard made a habit of scoring towering headers in the last WWC and she arrived on schedule here, slamming the ball into the turf and bouncing it over the despairing dives of the Brazilian defence. This group is wide open and Brazil must win against Jamaica to guarantee progression.
Panama 0 – 1 Jamaica
Brazil are in strife because the Reggae Girlz J-are-maican a run for the knockouts. The first half was one-way traffic with Panama clinging on as Jamaica, spearheaded by Drew Spence, peppered their goal without making a breakthrough. When it came, it was via yet another corner (theme of the round, if you haven’t already noticed). The chipped delivery was so inviting it had multiple Jamaican attackers queueing up for it – one and two were teasingly close but three was Allyson Swaby who made no mistake with a delicate glancing header. No real issues closing the game out and with Khadija ‘Bunny’ Shaw returning from suspension for the final game with Brazil, Jamaica only need a draw to make history.
Group G
Argentina 2 – 2 South Africa
South Africa really can’t catch a break. They scored first when Thembi Kgatlana sprung the Argentinian offside trap so cleanly that the entire Argentinian defence gave up, assuming that Kgatlana could only be so far through on goal that she’d been in an offside position – and they were apparently vindicated when the flag went up after Linda Motlhalo tapped in Kgatlana’s pass to round the keeper. But VAR took a closer look and it was la Albiceleste with egg on their face and a goal to the worse. It set up a very entertaining game with chances at both ends until Jermaine Seoposenwe picked Aldana Cometti’s pocket and crossed low for Kgatlana to slam into the roof of the net. 2-0 is the most dangerous score in football though. South Africa thought they had cleared an attack but the ball fell for Sophia Braun who let it bounce once before putting her foot right through it and clearing the diving keeper from 40 yards. Four minutes later, Romina Núñez found half a yard in the box and powered a header in. Either side could go through with a win in the final round, but both will feel like they let it slip here.
Sweden 5 – 0 Italy
So technically this is a thrashing but not morally. Let me explain: for 40 minutes, Italy ran this game with some lovely technical interplay, switching the play and creating some decent shots that the Swedish goalie had to beat away. Then for the next ten minutes, Sweden scored from all three corners they won. All three. The first and fourth goals were both scored by the simple method of Amanda Ilestedt out jumping everyone and powering home headers (I know I’ve overused this phrase but swear on my life this round it was players powering headers here, players powering headers there. Let me live!) – the defender became equal top of the golden boot chart when she picked up her second. In between that, another corner was kneed in by Fridolina Rolfö and Sweden scored their third from open play (quelle horreur!) as a shellshocked Italian defence failed to clear a loose ball. Job done for the Swedes but Italy are now in a straight shoot-out with South Africa for the right to get to the knock-outs.
Group H
South Korea 0 – 1 Morocco
It takes a lot to recover from losing 6 – 0 in your first ever World Cup game so clearly the Atlas Lionesses have guts, grit and gumption in spades. It only took them six minutes as well, working the ball carefully down the right flank to create space for Hanane Ait El Haj to whip in a low cross. Ibtissam Jraidi had about two metres to make up on the defence and did so with electric acceleration, stooping to glance a header across the face of goal and just inside the far post. But there’s such a thing as scoring too early and South Korea, Asian Cup finalists and WWC veterans, responded by… well… not really doing much? They did dominate possession but had the urgency of a tree sloth. Morocco’s defence, ably marshalled by Nouhaila Benzina (the first player to play at a WC wearing a headscarf), kept South Korea firmly at bay. Now Morocco meet Colombia where a win could see them break into the round of 16.
Germany 1 – 2 Colombia
The group leaders (at time of kick-off) faced off in the last game of the round and it was clear very early on that Colombia were not going to let Germany have it all their own way. The tackles were crunching, well-timed and often with just a little added spice – for example, Catalina Usme took the ball off Lina Magull (not an easy thing to do!) with just a hint of elbow to the body that left the German star fuming. The second half continued in the same tetchy vein until an intervention from 18-year old Linda Caicedo. A quick note on Caicedo – she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer at just 15, but has recovered to become her country’s star player only three years later. Given that, it’s understandable that she lacks any sense of respect for the supposedly imposing German defence. She was first to a loose ball in the box, turned Huth inside out so violently that tiny cartoon birds began orbiting Huth’s head, rounded Dabritz like she was a training cone and larruped the ball in off the bar. Germany were rocking and should perhaps have conceded more but instead, they found a way back in. Oberdorff rounded the keeper and was caught, buying Popp a chance to level. She did, with aplomb, and with only minutes to go, it seemed as though Colombia would have to settle for a draw. Until. 90+7 minutes. Colombian corner. Leicy Santos drops it into the mixer. Manuela Venegas. Rising from the pack to – say it with me folks – Power. The. Header. Net bulging. Purple shirts everywhere. Limbs. Chaos. And once the dust had settled, another major upset to lift the energy of this tournament even higher. Colombia just need a point from the final game against Morocco to win the group, Germany must get a result against South Korea to be certain of progressing.
Conclusion
Well my predictions for who to watch out for have mostly been flipped on their head. Suddenly Australia, not Canada, and Brazil, not France, are at highest risk of early exit. But thankfully, good old Norway continue to completely underwhelm. My faith in their frailty remains undimmed, though by the time most of you read this, they’ll probably have thrashed the Philippines and be through to the next round. Hold onto your hats folks, this is where it starts to get very messy.
First-ever-World-Cup-Threepeat-ometer: 4 waiters with Aussie accents at US themed diners in Amsterdam out of 10